Today we went on a school trip. All the second- and third-graders were going to Kyoto, and the first-graders to Takayama. I accompanied class 2-2 to Kyoto. We took a bus. I was warned ahead of time by Hattori-sensei, the homeroom teacher of 2-2 who is also an English teacher, that the students might ask me to sing on the bus. So I have been busy the last few days reviewing words to songs like "Kumbaya" and "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall", maybe even "Hey, Jude"... you know, the kind of songs students sing on long bus trips to pass the time (3 hours to Kyoto).
Wrong. I forgot Japan is the future.
The bus was equipped with karaoke. There were plugs every few seats for the mikes (2), so everyone could easily have a turn.
I managed to slip unnoticed through the morning karaoke. But in the afternoon, on the way home, I woke up from my nap JUST in time to be forced to lead a rousing karaoke rendition of the only English song of the day, "My Heart Will Go On." Yes, the Titanic theme. Yes, by Celine Dion.
The only worthwhile contribution to the state of the world from this whole karaoke fiasco was that, afterwards, Hattori-sensei told me that I had shattered a stereotype for her - she has heard four previous ALTs do karaoke, and she has assumed that foreigners must not be able to sing since they were apparently ALL terrible. (Japanese take their karaoke seriously.) It only occurred to me later that perhaps the absence of beer on the bus (and we hadn't even had a chance to take all the bottles down and pass them around!) could have had something to do my ability to stay (remotely) on key.
There are, fortunately, no pictures or video of this event to prove that it happened. So I deny everything.
And now, please excuse me: I must go wash out my mouth my soap, many, many times.